Wings.

Dearest blog,

Tonight, Adam and I were sitting at Wild Wings and I felt completely uncomfortable. So I do what I always do when I'm uncomfortable in public and just sort of stayed quiet, hold back tears, and waited for it to be all over. I think it's more or less just the fact that I do NOT like sitting at a table in the middle of the restaurant. I prefer a booth. However, this is neither here or there.

The point of this blow is to tell you about the little girl that sat diagonal from us. She was about 10 or 11 and was over weight and so was her mother.  Her and her mother were eating what looked like a burger and they ate it disgustingly. This brought back memories of my mom and I.

I remember being about that age and doing the same thing with my mother. But I also remember not liking to eat where everyone can see me. Because, you know, people do see you and they do judge you, just as I was always very paranoid about. People watch you from afar and make sure you can't see them watching you.

Anyways, while I was watching her and making sure her mother didn't see me staring and thinking I was some sort of freak. I thought about what I wish someone would have done to me when I was her age....just run up, grab my shoulders, shake me and tell me to stop eating because I'm only going to get bigger. I think if someone would have done that to me at that age, I would have been blessed with anorexia or some other kind of eating disorder because no one really messes with you when you're too skinny, but if you're slightly over weight, it's "fuck you".

I guess in my own sadistic way, I was trying to mentally save her from an over weight hell that the world so kindly makes for you.